Lesbian log twenty-six-ten-twenty-one What’s your why? I once filled my days with people and experiences. My life was like an ion surrounded by protons and electrons whirling around me. My family made up my molecular whole. Outside of that, I had friends, acquaintances, jobs, hobbies, curious pursuits…an entire universe tailored to the life I’d created …
Tag Archives: gay life
Questions
Lesbian log zero-seven-ten-twenty-one There are so many questions on this path, and it’s hard moving forward when you question every decision before and after you make it, and while you’re making it. Did I make the right choice? Is this the right path forward? Will I ever be happy? Will I make it through this? …
And so it begins….Episode Two
originally published in The Globe and Mail March 29, 2021 “I think I’m gay.” The words came barreling out like a runaway train careening toward an unfinished bridge ahead, warning lights flashing, signs pleading to stop or turn back. But there was no turning back. I sat across from my husband of almost 30 years, …
Numbness
Lesbian log twenty-nine-zero-six-twenty-one The thing I miss the most about chronic depression is the numbness. I excelled at tamping things down so deep that I was barely cognizant of the dissonance. The rumble of discontentment was more like a fly hovering around a wine glass, and I effortlessly shooed it out of mind. This talent …
Drop in the Bucket
Lesbian log twenty-four-zero-six-twenty-one For many, COVID-19 has meant a complete disruption in schedule and programming. Just the daily routine of going into work has been interrupted for many. COVID has had immeasurable impacts on people’s mental health. For those going through trauma and difficult life changes, the repercussions of the pandemic have been devastating. Navigating …
Work in Progress
Lesbian log twenty-three-zero-six-twenty-one In an attempt to stay accountable, this blog will be my litmus test. This morning, I woke up and made it onto the treadmill for a second day in a row. This allowed me to increase the intensity of my jog-to-walk ratio. A positive sign. I am by nature a delicate flower. …
Muddy Boots
Lesbian log twenty-two-zero-six-twenty-one Yesterday was a pretty down day. I say that, but in truth it was just another day in a full calendar of down days. I described it as being frozen in time, mired in a tar pit of despair. Darkness has been a constant companion for a couple years now. I’ve tried …
Food for One
Lesbian log twenty-six-zero-three-twenty-one Cooking is the bane of my existence. I’m not fond of it. I eat because I have to to survive, and when I finally force myself to cook, I’m a slave to a recipe because I lack confidence in the kitchen. I grew up eating a very bland diet. My father had …
Perspective is Everything
Lesbian log zero-three-zero-three-twenty-one Nothing has changed this week. I still know my time with my kids is dwindling down—like watching the last streams of sand empty from the hour glass—but over the last few days, I’ve tried hard to look at my experience from a place of abundance and stop dwelling in a space of …
Parenting Fail
Lesbian log twenty-five-zero-two-twenty-one Why is it that following the path of your truth often leads to immeasurable hardship? Why must growth equal challenge and pain? I’ve been asking myself this over and over again lately. I’m sure there are instances where growing out of an old skin evolves smoothly, with merely a slight tug of …